TALE童话日记: 迟来的知觉

贝儿睁开眼睛，周围的灯光，阳光对她来说很刺眼，令她感觉很不舒服。她知道自己睡了很久，迟了，太迟了。一位宛如天使般微微发光地女子出现了，先是愣了一下，然后雀跃万分地大喊。贝儿看了她几眼，朦胧的影象开始变得清晰。“嫂嫂。。。”贝儿细声地叫道。刚冲进房里的哥哥贾森，兴奋激动地问贝儿，“你知道她是你嫂嫂？”贝儿轻轻地点头。她知道，她什么都知道，只是睡不醒而已。

八年了，足足昏睡了八年。每一天，贝儿都听见贾森对她说话，到后来加入了嫂嫂，两人无微不至的照顾，连结婚也草草了事，说要等贝儿醒来才补办。不只是这些，还有每天对泰乐的思念，那种心焦如焚的情绪异常地痛苦，奈何眼皮不听脑袋的使唤，原来能够睡醒，也是一种幸福。而那一场噩梦，也每一天不断地在脑海里重演。

那是会考的前一天，贝儿和泰乐以及他们的同窗露伊在医肚子。一张小桌子，堆满了课本笔记和食物，坐着他们三个，就像黛安娜王妃形容她和查理斯王子，“我们（婚姻里）有三个人，太拥挤了”。贝儿不是爱吃醋，只是心思细腻的她，总是在乎着些什么。此时，一声巨响把所有人吓呆了，是附近警局里传来的爆炸声。有人说是警察的防恐演习，好奇的泰乐还走近瞧个究竟。但贝儿却有一种悲观的预感，事情好像不是那么简单，于是她喊破喉咙地要泰乐回来。

接下去，第二次，第三次的爆炸声传开来，而且越来越响。人群开始恐慌了，不是防恐演习，而是纳米叛军发起的暴动。流弹一颗颗地从天而降，贝儿不顾一切地冲向泰乐，抓紧他一起逃跑。可惜，一颗流弹早已相中了贝儿，痛得她立即倒下，再也站不起来。泰乐想停下扶她，但一心只想泰乐安全的贝儿叫他赶快走，别理自己。在人潮的推挤下，不只泰乐的身影越来越远，那份对贝儿坚定的眼神也越来越迷蒙。慢慢地，贝儿也昏睡了。

再次醒来时，不在身边的，除了泰乐，还有右腿。那一次的轰炸，加上人群的践踏，右腿血肉模糊。是身为医生的贾森把她救回来，还装上了义肢。当然，贝儿的心意，贾森最清楚不过了。“我打探到泰乐的消息，你要去见他吗？”贾森问她心疼的妹妹。从他的眼神，贝儿知道一切已不如从前。她握紧了哥哥和嫂嫂的手，湿了眼眶，“谢谢你们，没有放弃我。。。”

在贾森和嫂嫂的陪伴下，贝儿回到了那个地方。昔日的城镇，除了被炸毁的楼房，似乎没有什么变过。每一条街，每一栋楼，贝儿都记得。终于，来到泰乐的面前，两人对望，没有千言万语，没有深情拥抱，一句‘我已和露伊结婚’从泰乐的口中说出。他的眼神淡定，早已没有当年的爱意。此时贝儿已经泪流满面，放声痛哭。手里握着泰乐退还给她的笔记，那是以前贝儿细心为他准备应考的笔记，贝儿缓缓地倒退走。她知道，自己不应该再出现在泰乐的生活里。三个人的故事，就这样已残忍的方式结束。

望着那叠笔记一张张地坠落，贝儿觉得自己的身子比它们还轻，不知道谁先抵达平行线，感觉上比她心里的无底洞还要深。她想永远地睡着，那样就可以什么都不知道。这，是她可以放手的唯一方法。。。

BEAUTY美丽日记: Waiting for my Ricci Ricci~

I never used any perfume or fragrance back in few years ago. Instead, I hated them, seeing them as unnecessary item which is expensive and useless. Does it make you more beautiful? No. Does it make you more presentable? No. And I dislike those powdery or weird oily scent that makes me suffocated.

Until I got my first perfume from his friend, Stanley who brought it back as souvenir during his study trip in UK. It’s Avril Lavigne Black Star, which is not available in Malaysia. Things changed drastically since then. I am obsessed with perfume now! Believe me, once you are hooked on it, there is no way to turn back.

For me, it’s not about putting on scent on your body and let everyone who passed by you sensing the scent that your are wearing. It’s about a complete package you wear that shows who you are. [TIPS: No matter what perfume you are using, limit yourself to maximum 3 spray! Please consider people with allergic to perfume. I spray twice in front of my chest, once slightly to the left and once to the right.]

Listed below are types of perfume, and main categories of scent:

§  Perfume extract, or simply perfume (Extrait): 15-40% aromatic compounds

§  Esprit de Parfum (ESdP): 15-30% aromatic compounds

§  Eau de Parfum (EdP), Parfum de Toilette (PdT): 10-20% (typical ~15%) aromatic compounds

§  Eau de Toilette (EdT): 5-15% (typical ~10%) aromatic compounds

§  Eau de Cologne (EdC): Chypre citrus type perfumes with 3-8% (typical ~5%) aromatic compounds

§  Perfume mist: 3-8％ aromatic compounds (typical non-alcohol solvent)

(From http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfume)

Floral: most perfumes are created by flowers and this is a highly popular scent. Flowers used to create floral smell range from roses, gardenia, carnations, jasmine and orange blossoms.

Oriental: This is a good scent for the winter due to its strong musky nature it is a mixture of spices, amber, balsams and resins.

Citrus:  These are soft subtle fragrances that are best when used in the summer time.  The scents derive from citrus fruits, like lemon, limes, tangerine and mandarins.

Chypre: This popular scent was name by the first person to invent perfume Francois Coty, he was inspired by the island of Cyprus where he inhaled scents and thus created Chypre.  This is a woodsy-mossy mix that also has hints of bergamont, oak, moss, citrus and other earthy aromas.

Green: When you think green, think of grassy, pine, leaves or anything you may find in a forest. This is a great scent for the athletic type.

Fougere: A strong scent mostly used by men, but women also love this smell. It is a combination of fresh herbs and mossy substances.

Oceanic: Synthetic perfumes that emulate scents of the ocean and it’ surroundings.

Fruity: Sets off a spicy and fresh scent as well as a fruity smell. This is a great scent for the summer time.

Woody Scents: Think forest when you think of woody scents; these scents derive from bark, moss and other things you would find in a forest.

(From http://www.beauty-makeup-tips.org/Fashion/Perfumes/Types-of-Perfume.htm)

Honestly, scent is not the most important factor when I choose perfume, it’s the bottle and package. Geez, I have such soft spot for cute and girlish packaging. So when my eyes saw this for the first time, I never think or like other brand. She is, Ricci Ricci by Nina Ricci!

Why? It’s pink in color, with a ribbon knot at the bottle cap and look at the model who resembles Catwoman! Cute, mysterious and mischievous. Gives off sweet fruity/floral scent (not so sure as I am not picky about the scent) which is suitable for young girls. They have other range too, from more fruity to more classical scent, and adorable bottles of course.

Christmas and my birthday are coming not so soon, but I will be patient. *Winks* (*Stares* at him!)

BEAUTY美丽日记: Hair Band with Wavy Locks

I always love wavy hair, rather than totally straight rebonding hair, it looks nice on certain people though, as it gives you silky and shiny texture to your hair, increasing your feminine and soft level. But that’s just not my personality, I am fierce and rough and ‘just-do-whatever-I-want” type.

So, when hair band and wavy locks clash together, it’s just so myself! Those wavy locks resemble my personality, and the hair band adds just a little soft and cute side to me. Feel free to choose a thick hair band for retro look, or thin hair band for cute look. If you are going out for an event, a hair band with huge decorations on it will make you stand out among others!

How I achieve the look – Wash and dry your hair with a hair dryer in twisting motion, i.e. divide your hair into 2 portions, drying each at a time, with your hand twisting them down. Use your fingers to run through your hair to tousle them a bit. Put the selected hair band on top of your head and there you go!  [TIPS: Adjust the hair band location to suit your frames and features, say, if your hair is side parted to the left, then the decoration of the hair band should be at the right.]

Sweet girl with sweet dessert. (Ehh, did I just say I’m fierce?)

FEELINGS心情日记: 回到原点

每次踏上槟城，我都会有一种莫名的兴奋，大概因为那时我的出生之地（北海）。无论是半日的偷闲或三两天的旅行，都让我念念不忘。

最近两次去槟城，都是与车一同乘坐渡轮到槟岛，然后使用槟威大桥返回半岛。在车子缓缓驶进渡轮月台时，我就非常期待，车子一就位，我迫不及待走下车，享受海风。靠半岛的那一端还可见渔船，舢板和木桥的踪影，而目的地-槟岛，则是发展蓬勃的城市，远远就可看见光大（KOMTAR），时钟楼和其他高楼。每隔一小时的钟声在耳边悠悠响起，脑海里浮现父亲告诉我，他和母亲年轻时乘坐渡轮的情景。

来到槟城，没有理由不吃个一餐半餐的，不管是马来人，华人或印度人的传统面食，小吃和甜点，总有合你心意的。和同事在一个穆斯林印裔小贩中心/广场用餐，凳子还未坐暖，四面八方迎来的档主你一句，我一句地，“烤鱿鱼，鲜虾面，椰奶汁，蕹菜鱿鱼，杂锦啰惹（PASEMBUR）。。。”千万不要在这一刻随意点头微笑，因为他们真的会把所有食物端上。那一天的顾客稀少，同事说，以前各个摊位在海边树下摆摊时生意非常好。迁进市政局为他们设立的广场后，生意不如从前。这令我想起关仔角，完善的设备提升了饮食素质，却多了一份商业味，少了浓厚的情怀。

槟城有一个屹立不倒的名胜地，就是极乐寺。我必须承认我不是一位虔诚的佛教徒，对宗教信仰都是跟随母亲的指示。不过每每去到极乐寺，心情神色都会变得端庄许多，毕竟是神明香火熏陶的地方。那一次去极乐寺拜拜是我最难忘的，因为我的一位亲人在同一天往生。站在新建立的观音神像前，我诚心祈祷，希望他的家人坚强度过难关，不再受到任何苦难。

令我津津乐道的，就是和好友一起去槟城毕业旅行，关于美食的趣事。在关仔角，喜爱娘惹糕点的我们，扫了不少价廉物美的娘惹糕，并且乐于和两个男的分享。奈何两个男的露出‘我不想吃’的表情，令我和好友不禁纳闷，要你吃这些糕很‘惨’么。在BATU FERINGGHI 路边吃了水果啰惹，好友直呼太感动了。水果鲜甜美味，配料入味十足，真想把碟子舔个一干二净。在位于沟渠旁的五脚基，平日非常讲究饮食卫生的好友不顾一切地把香辣的叻沙吞下，不爱吃叻沙的他也从此接受并爱上叻沙。而我，当然是把所有鱼肉，香菜，洋葱，黄梨和粗米粉连同汤汁吸光。

还有深深吸引我的，是那些充满历史风味的旧式建筑物和街道名称，于英国殖民时期建立并留下的。当中有教堂，市政局，法庭，银行等，我想，在如此古色古香的地方上班应该会心旷神怡。有一个情景深刻地印在我脑海里-某一条街道上，左边是一排陈旧的木屋，右边是四栋约二十层楼高的公寓。我想这里即将，或已经上演发展商和老地主对立的一幕。

槟城就是这样一个吸引目光的地方，历史文化和经济发展，在两条平行线上不遑多让。未来演变成什么样子，是槟州子民所关注的，因为它牵动着大家的命脉。

KITCHEN厨房日记: Everyone can make Pizza at home!

Breakfast with him is always fun. It can be Chinese coffee shop, Indian/Mamak restaurant, Malay Nasi Lemak (Rice in coconut milk with spicy chili sambal) or just at home, practicing our creative and innovative thinking. And here comes the idea of making a Pizza, with whatever we have in the fridge!

We always wanted to use up the Paratha Bread (similar to Chapatti) we bought last time, hence this is the 3^rd idea of using it (1^st was Pita Bread Salad and 2^nd was Satay in a Bag). 2 Paratha bread were used for the pizza, 1 alone is too thin to support the topping. First, spread mayonnaise on the bread, followed by chili sauce/tomato ketchup.  Then, sprinkle the toppings ingredient on the bread. It can be mushroom, sausages, onion, capsicum, or even prawn and tuna, whatever you like.

Of course, a pinch of salt and spices are needed to spike up the flavor. I strongly recommend Paprika powder, which is my favourite nowadays! Lastly, coat the pizza with plenty of cheese (grated cheese or thin slices cheese). Don’t be stingy with the cheese, just add as much as you can! Bake them in oven for 5-10 mins, and here comes your pizza!

To our disappointment, the Paratha bread did not turn out to be as crunchy as it should be. Perhaps we should bake the bread alone first, before adding the toppings and bake again. Nevertheless, we love the taste! Everything is just nice in place. Using Paratha bread will give you a thin crust pizza, opt for Naan Bread if you want a pan pizza. They can be bought in frozen food department in any stores. [TIPS: Wholemeal bread is an excellent choice too! Perfect as a pizza toast for snacks or tea party.]

Yummy! Two is really better than one. And I cherish him much.

KITCHEN厨房日记: Home version of Manhattan Fish Market

While doing groceries in hypermarket, out of sudden, he asked, “Aren’t we supposed to cook Fish & Chips for dinner? You’ve promised me last 2 weeks.” Oops, he still remembers that. Moral value of the story – Don’t simply promise something if you don’t take it serious.

Ok, I said. And we bought Dory fish fillet and potato wedges from the frozen food department. The meal is easy to cook, we just used one hour to prepare and cook. Just deep fry the potato wedges till golden brown, drain from oil and absorb extra oil with kitchen towel. You don’t want it to be oily!

I prefer baked fish than deep frying it, so we prepare 2 versions. For the deep fry one, season the fish fillet with salt, ground black pepper and paprika powder. Dip into egg, coat it with mixture of flour and baking soda, and then fry it. It looked good the moment it is cooked, but after a while, sigh, we just can’t get the crispy texture like how restaurants out there do.

For the baked fish, wrap the fish loosely with aluminium foil. Sprinkle lemon juice, salt, ground black pepper, basil and paprika on the fish. Feel free to add any spices and seasoning you like. Then, bake the fish in oven for 20 mins. Eww! I forgot to add lemon juice, and it turned out to be too dry. Luckily, the texture of the fillet is still tender.

Never mind, home-cooked food always tastes better no matter how. Just need some improvements.

KITCHEN厨房日记: Buttery Apple Torte – Must Use 3 Apples!

Yea, it wasn’t perfect, as I was short of apples and use only 1. Hence, the apple is invisible, and the texture is just merely like a cake, rather than a torte. This is best for high-tea, cut in squares and served with coffee or tea. Perfect match!

Cook thick-sliced apples with butter in a frying pan until they are tender and golden in color. Beat eggs before adding melted butter, sugar and other ingredients. Add flour and cooked apples, stir well and spoon into baking pan, smoothing the top. Bake until browned, around 30 mins. [TIPS: How to know if your cake is done, without cutting it and peeping inside? Insert a ‘satay’ stick/fine chopstick in the middle of the cake. You know it’s done when the stick comes out clean and dry.]

Coffee, tea or me? *winks*

BEAUTY美丽日记: Shoes Shoes Shoes*

This picture explains why girls and ladies always have much more shoes than boys and men do!

I remember those days living in apartment with 3 other housemates in university, where the pitiful cupboard was not enough to store our shoes! So, some of our shoes were stacked up in boxes on the floor, and those frequently worn to classes and outings were placed near the main entrance. Things got worse when our close friends from other block came visit us. It looked like a shoe stall in night market! Too bad, I don’t have any picture as a proof.

My favorites are: Chunky Heel, Peep Toe, Wedge, Mary Jane and T-Strap. They can be cute, vintage-feel, sophisticated, classy, sexy, feminine, and edgy. Stiletto Pumps are NO-NO for me, since I walk like an elephant (that’s what my mum says). It’s either I will trip in them, or I will break the tiny skinny heels. [TIPS: To test if the heels are strong and stable enough to support your leg, stand on single leg and put all your weight on that leg when trying the heels.]

So, what are your favorites?

*Shoes Shoes Shoes is a shoe boutique in Bangsar, visit their online boutique at http://www.shoesshoesshoes.com.my/

KITCHEN厨房日记: Macaroni Salad

The day after I made Tuna Sandwich for dinner, I still have left over tuna with me. So, I made Macaroni Salad with it. Freedom is the key of doing Macaroni Salad, no such thing as ‘must’ ingredients, except Macaroni. Feel free to mix & match veggies like bell pepper, onion, celery and others with boiled egg, prawn, smoked salmon, bacon strips or tuna. [TIPS: Do use tuna flakes in oil, I used tuna spread in mayonnaise and it appeared to be sticky.] Then, season them with lemon juice, olive oil, mayonnaise, ground black pepper and paprika. Paprika adds a little spiciness to the dish, which increases your appetite and improve the appearance.

How much of Macaroni & other short pasta should you cook for one person (main course)? I would say half cup (measuring cup) of pasta is enough to feed a typical man for a meal, so ladies can go slightly less.

Still, two is better than one. Looking forward to the next meal with him!

FEELINGS心情日记: 出路

第一次寻找到一个方向，确定了目标，再踏出那一步，实实在在地做自己向往的事情。原来，感觉竟然是那么地踏实。

早几年前一个快速在‘机缘巧合’下做出的选择，竟然造成了往后几年的迷失和彷徨。那几年的时间，可以用得过且过来形容，一味跟着指示和规则去完成任务。同伴们在为将来的事业铺路时，我却在那里完全找不到一个定位，虽然成绩还是很优秀，那是因为我努力啃书。正因为这样，师长对我的评价越高，而我越是觉得不自在。

花了近两年的时间，了解自己，探索我真正喜欢做什么（工作），终于得到了答案，并幸运地被录取。只是，往往在你得到你想要的机会时，你却突然会有所顾虑而迟疑退缩。转换工作本来就是一个危机，更何况是要转去一个完全不是属于你的‘场地’（field that match your background）。原本明确的目标开始被乌云笼罩，很多问题出现在脑海里，比如，万一失败了怎么办？我做得到吗？读了五年的学位，就这样放弃了吗？

身边的长辈也不断问，为什么好好地XXX不要做，偏要去XX上班？面对父母的忧虑和费解，我更是内疚，觉得这样的局面让他们难堪了。奈何，我清楚地知道，如果我不再去面对并勇敢地改变，那我只有每天都空想，长期毫无目标地混下去。在这心烦意乱的时候，远在英国的好友敲醒了我的脑袋。她说我很幸运，至少我已经清楚知道自己要什么，既然知道了，怎么还不趁早改变？将来生活里出现更多因素要考虑时，就更难迈向理想了。

朋友们的开导，的确令我更坚持地走向这条荆棘之路。嗯，其实也没什么大不了，不过是工作的事情，并不是什么解决不了的灾难。套文文说的那句话，‘都不知道你在烦什么，怕什么，你是去XX上班，又不是去XX打抢！’这句话还真让我笑傻了。

一切暂时安定下来了，很幸运地，我被派到这个区部受训。前辈，同事和经理们友善的态度和亲切的教导，无疑是给了我一剂强心针，让我有信心向前迈进。真的是观音妈有保庇，阿嫲有保庇。当然，未来有很多未知数，相信会更艰难。但至少，我没有后悔，因为我做到了，踏出了那一步，认真衷心地工作学习，开心上班，开心下班。不再有蓝色星期一，也不再茫（盲）然地过日子。

回首过去，我并没有觉得自己做错选择，也不认同这样是白费了学位。因为这是生命里寻找自己的过程，每走一条路，就一定有收获。希望接下来，一切都顺心如意。感谢他从头到尾的大力支持，感谢朋友们和我分享喜悦，感谢长辈们的关心提醒，也要感谢父母的体谅和接纳。

BEAUTY美丽日记: Konichiwa ~

I love to wear traditional clothing, and 2 of my favourites are Cheongsam (Chinese) and Kimono (Japanese). I tried Cheongsam a few times during some events or performance back in school and university, and I felt great! (It’s not easy to fit in Cheongsam, ya know.) Too bad, I do not have any (nice) pictures that time to share with.

So, one more to go! I love Kimono too, the big wrap around with wide belt hugging your waist, tied with a big ribbon at the back. Can’t resist anything with ribbon! I once read from an article, that in ancient time, which is a conservative era, Kimono comes with a wide and thick belt at the waist so that women’s curve is not revealed. The belt is so thick that from side view, your chest and hips appear to be flat. [TIPS: Remember not to have a big feast prior to wearing Kimono, the belt will make your face turn green!]

To my surprise, Japanese Garden in Bukit Tinggi provides Kimono rental, at RM20 per person for about half an hour. Guys can rent a Samurai suit at same price too (actually it’s just like a Kimono, not the one with armor like you see in tv). Wearing the suit, you can take photos in the hut and garden. Gosh, it’s not easy to move in Kimono! The long wrap around your leg restricts your leg movement when you walk, it’s meant to make you walk in smaller steps anyway.

Love this pose, looks feminine. (No? Nay...)

That's him! The koi fish loves him too I guess. *tee hee*

Welcome!

Waiting for the one

Well, didn’t expect the garden to be so small, with lots of steps made of stones. Not so suitable for elderly I suppose. Nevertheless, it’s still fun to be there, in a Kimono!